Being Queer, Feminist, Kinky………..So Sue Me.*Shrugs*


Ok. Yeah so some don’t agree with my use of the word Queer. Ethier because they find it offensive, or they don’t think it applies to me, or they don’t care for my personal definition of the word.  No Big.  


Queer has traditionally meant odd or unusual, though modern use often pertains to LGBT (gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender, intersex and non-normative heterosexual) people. Its usage is considered controversial and underwent substantial changes over the course of the 20th Century with some LGBT people re-claiming the term as a means of self-empowerment. The term is still considered by some to be offensive and derisive, and by others as a re-appropriated term used to describe a sexual orientation and/or gender identity or gender expression that does not conform to heteronormative society.

 What’s really burning my butt though, is some of the nasty notes I’ve gotten on dating sites and MySpace when I declared what types of people I’m attracted to.   This one chick had the gall to write to me and state that considering that I am into BDSM, and attracted to Butch Females and Trans Males, that in no way could I call myself a feminist. Unfortunately she blocked me, so I couldn’t write back a bitchy reply. ( I posted an slightly edited version of this rant on MySpace, hoping that a few of my friends would comment…but no. lol. I decided to post it here, without the edits, because this is too good of a topic to pass up.)

To me Feminism is about women having the same/equal rights as men.  To a certain extent (least here in the U.S.) We have won alot of the battles.   The continuence of Feminism is to make sure that what rights we have, don’t go away. And, to see about hoping women around the world have the option of similiar rights. (Depending on the Country. Like for instance, in Afganistan, Women having the option to work where they want, etc, but may have the option to wear their Veils. Education, helping women make informed decisions.)

Anyone who is for Women getting equal treatment is a Feminist, in my book. Whether they are Male,Female,GQ(GenderQueer.)Butch, Femme, Trans Males, Trans Females,Intersexed, etc.

You know what I wanted to say to that crazy woman who wrote me a note? I wanted to ask her: Well what would you call a woman who is straight and considers herself a Feminist? I mean, straight women are attracted to men…and I know I am correct…I used to be straight. *snickers*

I think I get what she was saying, reading between the lines. She was saying, that because I had commited not only the sin of falling into the heteronormative trap, but that I was encouraging the Rape culture concept by being into kink.  Wow. (Now, mind you this is speculation.)  Ok, so then by being liked to be spanked, and tied up, roughly fucked, and all that other deliciously evil stuff, I am asking to be RAPED? Is that it?! So does that further mean that because I would like to visit similiar acts on others mean that I want to be the RAPIST? Or even more, maybe I had some (unknown) trauma happen when I was young that caused me to be warped this way.  (Now, not implying there is something wrong with a person who has had a trauma and in their adult life, seeks out kink/lifestyle.  Though I do recommend that that person seek professional help before getting to deep into it.)

OHH,  HELL FUCKING NO!  Maybe it is just rationalization, and an abject refusal to see things that way. I don’t really give a shit if it is.


About SwitchWitch

I am 5'3, with medium brown colored hair, with blond and red highlights. Blue eyes. Almost but not quite vampire pale skin. I am a big woman, (at the time of writing this I am at 260 lbs. Yes I am aware that I am obese. I plan on going a on a diet soon. I like Butch Females,(Boi's and not.) as well as Trans Males. And yes, Trans Males I do see you as being fully male. That may sound contradictory, but to me it isn't.

One response »

  1. RIGHT ON SISTER! I’ve gotten the same hateful reactions from people that I know, especially the “if you like to be ____ then it means you have a fucked up perception of sex.” Who are they to tell me what “acceptable sex” is??? Also, totally agree with your definition of a feminist (equal treatment for women.) It’s funny, I also love the word “queer” precisely because of the traditional “odd/unusual” connotation. I identify as queer not only because I am pansexual & polyamorous but because I feel a connection with others who are “queer” or “weird.”

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